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Are you going to answer my questions, or do I have to whack you with a stick until delicious candy surprises fall out?

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny questions surprises jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs pinata zeb

And soon we were just rolling around on the ground, cursing and screeching and ripping out handfuls of hair. Without super hearing, I wouldn't have heard Zeb whisper, "This is the coolest thing I have ever seen.""Maybe they'll get muddy," Dick said. "Please, Lord, let them get muddy.

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny richard mud dick jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb missy

Zeb was kindergarten teacher--a good one. I always thought it was because he was the same emotional age as his students.

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny maturity kindergarten jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb

You want to stab me again, don't you?"He didn't look at all ashamed. "Think of it as testing the limits of your new abilities."I groaned. "I've created a monster.""I don't think someone who recently crawled from the grave should be throwing around labels like 'monster,'" he said, making sarcastic little air-quotes fingers. "It wasn't a grave," I sniffed. "It was a comfy four-poster.

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny monster jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb four-poster

Most of the people you read about being turned meet vamps in clubs or over the Internet...Ew, did you...?""Yes, I met a vampire on the Internet, went to his evil love den, and let him turn me, because I'm that brainless.

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny sarcasm internet jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb

Get the point?" I asked, offering the boys a triumphant smile.Gabriel, Zeb, and Dick stared at me, aghast. "What? Sarcastic postkill comeback. Isn't that what you're supposed to do in situations like this?Too harsh?

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny sarcasm gabriel richard dick jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb postkill-comeback

Would you kick her ass already?" Dick said, shoving me back toward Missy. "Come on, Stretch, man up. You do better than this! Get mad."I nodded, rolling a dislocated shoulder back into place with a grunt and staggering back toward my opponent. Behind me, Zeb yelled, "She tried to hurt Fitz!" He turned to Gabriel and Dick. "That'll get her mad."Gabriel rolled his eyes. "She's been framed for murder twice over, shot in the back, her arms were set on fire, and her parents are being held hostage. You think tampered dog water is what's going to make her angry?" "You tried to hurt my dog!" I wheezed as I lurched toward a grinning Missy.

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny dog gabriel richard fitz dick jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb

Besides, my drinking blood's not nearly as weird as that time I caught you shaving your legs.""I was curious!

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
funny vampire jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb bloodsucker

I would have taken Zeb, purely for entertainment value, but he had an actual date, with a real girl. That hadn't happened in a while, so I was a good friend and put my own needs second to the possibility of him actual sex with a real girl.

Molly Harper , em Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
sex funny jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb

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