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I once asked her if she was happy. “That depends on what I am able to get done today,” she said, laughing. She told me that the completion of her daily tasks was the only thing she felt she had control over. They were a form of meditation, of salve. Kept busy, she had no time to ruminate and no time for opinions, certainly not feminist ones. I pressed her: “I mean, are you happy with your life, Rajima?” “I don’t know,” she said uncomfortably, as if she’d never really considered such a question. “When there is little you can do, you do what you can.” Happiness for my grandmother seemed to be a verb rather than a noun. She had so little control over her own life. Yet she took control, out of thin air for herself, when she could.

Padma Lakshmi , em Love, Loss, and What We Ate: A Memoir
feminism women-s-rights arranged-marriage traditional-female-roles

As long as fathers rule but do not nurture, as long as mothers nurture but do not rule, the conditions favoring the development of father-daughter incest will prevail.

Judith Lewis Herman , em Father-Daughter Incest: With a New Afterword
inequality incest child-abuse patriarchy sexual-abuse child-sexual-abuse abusive-men abusive-parent traditional-female-roles abusive-father

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