When you fall short of your goals and dreams ask yourself is it your mindset, perspective, expectations, effort, approach, acceptance, company or a blend of these that needs to change.
You are not who you think you are. You are not who they want you to be. You are not merely your colour, class, gender - and so on - these are quite narrow things. You are not the ideas you are given and gather. You are not what you own or lay claim to. You are not even your life story - for that changes through time, perspective, emphasis and many things. You are what resides before, between and beyond all these things." - R. Ogunlaru
Inspiration may come from many places but motivation - the love of life, daily drive and the will to thrive - that must come from you from within
What happiness?Here we have a kind of what they call a multiple choice question.Like any difficult question, let's go through elimination.Happiness is not really about having a good job, but obviously it's not about getting available in the market.It's not in the new car, but it's not about relying on public transport either.She is not in the college diploma, but not is in not having the opportunity to study.It is not in being better than others in some activity, but neither is it in not being good at anything.It is not in the accumulation of capital, but it is not in dependence on the state.In fact, happiness is not even happiness.Happiness is moment. Being with the one you love. Conquer what you want. But pass. Not everything you have seems to be exactly what you wanted. Nothing is eternal. Do you see grace in the eternal?Grace, that all things tend to lose after some time. Our standard of living is transformed.We note then that the happiness that everyone asks themselves is what they call "the meaning of life," that which flows a good way of living.The good way to live that may or may not be eternal. But in the long run it is that state of mind that the glass is half full. It is the result of the counterpart of the onus of the fascinating existential singularity.The question then is not what it is, but how it is. How to achieve.It's part of something. Have recognition. Get answers. All in all. To make things part of you. To recognize what you have. To valuing each achievement. It is action and reaction. It's a verb.Understand that we come into the world in the same way we will leave it: without being able to carry anything, but to leave. In this moment, as well as the good way of living, we transform doubt.Now the question is "what has it left"? What is your contribution to the world?We have a beginning: be guided by what you can do to make the world better than you have found. We have a beginning ... the rest ... it's up to you.
Life is fundamentally a mental state. We live in a dream world that we create. Whose life is truer, the rational man of action pursuing practical goals of personal happiness and wealth or the philosophic man who lives in a world of theoretical and metaphysical ideas? We ascribe the value quotient to our lives by making decisions that we score as either valid or invalid based upon our personal ethics and how we think and behave.
When the vision is clear, the results will appear. Keep your mindset positive as you work your plan, flourish, and always remember why you started.
Any fool can break something, criticise someone and tear things apart. It takes a far more skilled, wise and kind soul to build something, nurture someone, fix things and help others thrive over time.
Think about every good thing in your life right now. Free yourself of worrying. Let go of the anxiety, breathe. Stay positive, all is well.
Programming your mind with positive thoughts each day will go a long way to keep you from allowing external criticism to derail your dreams.
You can't reach your potential by remaining in a past due season. Your breakthrough is coming. Strongholds are breaking. Get Ready!
The ego might resist change until a person’s level of discomfort becomes unbearable. A person can employ logic to overcome the ego’s defense mechanism and intentionally integrate needed revisions in a person’s obsolete or ineffective beliefs and behavior patterns. The subtle sense that something is amiss in a person’s life can lead to a gradual or quick alteration in a person’s conscious thoughts and outlook on life. Resisting change can prolong unhappiness whereas implementing change can establish internal harmony and instate joy in a person’s life.
Without curiosity and passion, the world will seem to lack possibility and everything in life will appear pre-ordained. It is important for a person to spend the majority of the day pursuing their passionate interests and enlisting their innate inquisitiveness. Life is so much sweeter when we contemplate pleasant as opposed to distasteful thoughts. We feel most alive when we create an apt channel for our creative impulses, and engage in thoughtful discourse relating to our concordant values.
Your attitude can either be your best friend who has your best interest at heart or your worst enemy who wants to see you fail, destroy your life, and be miserably unhappy. It’s imperative that you check your attitude. Make sure that your attitude is working for you, not against you. There’s limitless value in having a positive, empowered, and optimistic attitude! Choose wisely which attitude you give life to.
The strongest principle of personal development is every person’s ability to make conscious decisions how to act and determine what purpose he or she attempts to fulfill. People with a fixed mindset believe that their basic personal qualities such as intelligence, talent, and other skills are traits that are predetermined or fixed and they ignore opportunities for personal development. A person’s growth mindset represents a belief that there are certain basic qualities that a person can cultivate through applied effort, if they exhibit a passion for learning, a resolute willingness to stretch their personality, and through fortitude make personal improvement despite experiencing initial hardships.
Reflecting on various aspects of our lives is essential for a person to grow and adjust to changing phases in their life. Self-analysis entails examining a person’s existing level of self-esteem and documenting the inner voice that speaks to a person, which is frequently either affirming of self-defeating. Failure to periodically engage in self-analysis, make crucial revisions in our personas, and modify our thinking patterns when we encounter transformative events in life can lead to mood disorders, burnout, and other emotional maladies.
Life has a tendency to provide a person with what they need in order to grow. Our beliefs, what we value in life, provide the roadmap for the type of life that we experience. A period of personal unhappiness reveals that our values are misplaced and we are on the wrong path. Unless a person changes their values and ideas, they will continue to experience discontentment.
Is chemistry a biological reaction which supports the propagation of our species? Or is it simply about being excited to find someone with mutually shared values, passions, interests, or experiences? Or is it because you have the same energy, vibrate at the same frequency, or share the same attitude? Regardless of how it happens, a robust and healthy chemistry is always a nice surprise and something to be celebrated.
Bringing a great attitude with positive energy is one of the best strategies you can have for your personal and professional success. Matching our energy with another person’s will help us build rapport and relationships more easily.
We are all wired with a natural propensity to learn, grow, and expand. Think of the positive things that make you happy, bring you joy, deepen your understanding, and make you feel wonderful. These things enlarge and grow with positive energy, don’t they? The opposite is true as well; negative things make us feel stressed, sad, angry, or overwhelmed. They leave us feeling depleted and contracted.
The Broaden-and-Build Theory in Positive Psychology suggests that positive emotions initiate upward spirals of positivity which contribute to our optimal well-being. It is no wonder positive people are more likely to make a positive impact!
People who cast a negative energy can make us feel doubtful, devalued, and disrespected. In response, we contract and are left cold as our awesome energy evaporates in their shadow. Downward emotional spirals ensue.
A light-hearted point to consider: Do you know the number one reason a man falls in love with a woman? Because of how she makes him feel about himself. Do you know the number one reason a man falls out of love with a woman? Because of how she makes him feel about himself! It is the same reason! When you inspire and motivate another person through your positive energy, they want you to stick around!
Throughout your life you will meet thousands of people, but every once in a while, you feel instant chemistry with a person and connect immediately. It is like meeting an old friend or returning home again. Your relationship enjoys easy compatibility and commonality. Not only can you sometimes finish each other’s sentences, but regardless of how much time may pass, you can reunite and start up wherever you left off.
Instant chemistry feels great! It is a raw, organic emotion. The art and science of relationship chemistry is still a mystery to me, but it is always a delight when it happens. You certainly know when you feel it, and that sizzle begins many a new relationship.
Ask anyone who has ever fallen in love at first sight and they will tell you—their mutual chemistry created an instant attraction. We have all known friends who went on a first date and knew instantly that they would spend the rest of their life with that person. Or, they knew instantly there was no chance because there was no chemistry at all.
Unfortunately, while people may be considerate with their illness, they often lack the same consideration with their bad attitudes, not thinking twice about spewing their negative energy on everyone around them and making others sick in the process. Talk about making a bad impression, much less setting you up for an unfavorable outcome!
It's a fact. We are magnets who attract whatever we are being. When we emit positive energy, thoughts, feelings, and vibrations, we attract more positives to us. When we emit negative energy, thoughts, feelings, and vibrations, we attract more negatives.
The "Law of Attraction" simply states: “What you think about, you bring about.” Whatever you focus on will expand and attract more of the same. Whatever you are putting out there is usually what you are getting back. So, if you don’t like what you’re getting, you’ve got to change what you are giving.
You magnetize what you are being. You give a smile . . . you get a smile back. If you point fingers with anger, you will get anger in return. If you are obsessing about scarcity, you will continue to live in lack. If you focus on nurturing friends, you will enjoy more enriching relationships.
Without even realizing it, we magnetize people, opportunities, and outcomes. Many people continue to attract dysfunctional folks who bring trauma, drama, crisis, and negativity and then wonder why they are so miserable. Be cognizant of how you’re being because it is most certainly attracting what you’re receiving.
Cheri Davis is a fun, energetic, positive, and beautiful friend. We both share a vibrant and positive energy which is a rare and wonderful quality. No matter what is going on in the world, we have a magic ability to energize each other and make the day better simply by speaking. She once said to me, “Susan, our low is most people's high.” Indeed. We will not always match the energies of others, and when theirs is lower than ours, that can be a very good thing!
Emotion is energy in motion; therefore, different states of mind, perceptions, and feelings can all result in different electromagnetic frequencies. How can you elevate your enthusiasm and energize your life?
Throw out and discard all negative energy that comes your way and find the positives in the situations. You may be having a bad day at work or a lot to do, but be thankful you have a job to go to while many others do not. Always fuel your life with positive energy if you want to be successful.
Ask yourself and become more aware—are you . . . • Speaking poorly of others in judgment, gossip, and intolerance?• Looking for, dwelling on, and obsessing over the negative?• Being grumpy, negative, and infecting others with your bad attitude or victim mentality?
Your body language is your primary language—and one that every person understands! Although it is non-verbal, evidence suggests that our body language and tone of voice can have a bigger impact and account for more of our communication than the words we speak.
Being mindful of your body movement, facial expressions, voice tone, gestures, orientation, postures, and touch will help you project personal excellence for transforming your communications with others.
Your energy naturally produces a physical presence. I can see a person from across a crowded room and feel his or her energy. Before I've ever met them or shared the same space, I will pick up their vibe to know if she is someone I would like to know or if she is better to avoid.
Science proves that what appears to be solid is simply moving at a slower rate. Whereas, what is moving, grooving, and flowing, has a higher rate of vibration. We as humans work the same way.
Like everything else in our world, we too are energy. Each one of us is an energy being releasing our own distinctive energy signature that is perceptible to others by way of our choices, perceptions, behaviors, attitudes, and physical cues.
You know when you feel good and you know when you feel bad. As a result, you are experiencing and displaying a wide range of energies, aren’t you? Some bring you up, while some bring you down. Start paying attention to your unique energy.
At networking events, I am a heat-seeking missile for happy, vibrant people. With experience and practice, you can develop a sixth sense about whom to approach and of whom to be wary. I'm drawn to people with positive energy. I would rather be lifted up than pulled down. Wouldn’t you?
Imagine how your positive attitude feels when you are enjoying a fabulous day—the sky is blue, the grass is green, the birds are singing—and all is right in your world. You are filled with boundless energy and joyful optimism. Life is great! And then . . . you cross the path of an energy vampire whose low vibe and toxic energy drains out every bit of yours—pulling you down.
Your attitude is the one thing in this world you have complete control over. You have full command. As empowering as that truth can be, there are some days we let down and give in to a bad attitude.
Throughout my life, I have been blessed with a positive and resilient attitude. I grew up with an alcoholic father and he tested my disposition in more ways than you might imagine. Knowing I couldn't depend on him for positive reinforcement, I clung to my positive attitude like a life preserver to give me the strength for positivity and self-reliance. Otherwise, I would have sunk into the depths of low self-esteem and worthlessness. A positive attitude was my saving grace and it became a habit by choice, day-in and day-out.
I have known many people who have been incredibly successful in life. It was not necessarily because they had immense talent, brilliance, an expensive education, or exemplary skills. It was because they had an extraordinary attitude to take on life with love, passion, conviction, consistency, and hard work. What they all had in common was getting their minds right and becoming positive thinkers—which activated their potential to achieve remarkable things and build strong relationships.
Developing a positive attitude is one of the most transformational things you can do to shift your mindset, improve your disposition, manifest good things, and attract quality people into your life.
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Trying to engage with an unapproachable person can lead to embarrassment, alienation, and resistance. Why would we set ourselves up for that kind of pain and failure? It’s no wonder that people may avoid them—the risk of rejection is too great.
Approachable people . . . 1. Use body language to their advantage.2. Are open-minded to new people and new experiences.3. Encourage others to feel better about themselves.4. Are willing to be told not what they want to hear, but what they need to hear.5. Provide an inviting aura that is warm and comforting.6. Realize that authenticity and transparency earn trust.7. Intuitively tune into the feelings and needs of others.8. Are emotionally steady and respond appropriately when they sense awkwardness or discomfort in others.9. Radiate happiness and curbs cynicism. 10. Provide a safe environment for others to express themselves.11. Make others feel valued and appreciated.12. Listen and consider other people’s viewpoints and opinions.
Mirroring is a powerful neuro-linguistic programming technique that can be used to bond with others, build rapport, and reach mutual understanding more quickly. You may already be using it instinctively without even being aware.
Mirroring is simply the process of discreetly matching and mirroring the subtle behaviors and qualities of the person with whom you are connecting. It's a form of behavioral reflection that unconsciously reveals, "We're more alike than we are different.
Mirroring is especially helpful when our differences may divide. Think of the times when you have made a diligent effort to speak in another person’s native language to communicate and connect with comfort. By doing this, you are extending a considerate courtesy to meet them where they are, thus removing barriers and improving engagement.
Why Does Mirroring Work? Scientific research suggests ‘mirroring’ techniques works because of the mirror-neurons which are fired in our brains when we both perceive and take action. When we observe someone doing something, we may feel as if we are having the same experience.
When you see someone smile, does it naturally make you want to smile back? When you are irritable, do you find that people mirror your irritability? When someone yawns around you, do automatically do the same? When you hear someone celebrating, do you feel inclined to join in and celebrate too? Your responses are not forced, but instinctual and empathetic.
Who are we the most comfortable with? People who are the most like us! The “Similarity-Attraction Hypothesis” (Newcomb, 1956) found that similar (real or perceived) personalities are a major determinant of our likability and friendship choices. It is simply human to gravitate toward people like us. This tribal inclination runs the gamut across demographics of age, ethnicity, culture, education, religion, and even personality style. Mirroring will enable you to find ways to create the comfort of familiarity through similarity.
Don't you love meeting an approachable person? They roll out the proverbial “welcome mat.” Their energy and engaging openness make us feel safe. They project the messages, “I'm so glad to meet you. I like you. Tell me more about you. I'm so glad that you're here,” without even saying a word.
We’ll Leave the Light on for You! This Motel 6 slogan has been a successful marketing strategy for years because of its warm invitation and friendly welcome. They know that the comforts of home appeal to us all.
Expect good things from people; they feel it. You never know who you are going to meet, and projecting approachability will open doors of opportunity for you that you may not have discovered otherwise.
We are comforted when a person, place, or business is warm and inviting. Making us feel this way increases the likelihood that we will want to learn more, do business with them, or pursue a meaningful interaction.
Consider how others may feel about you before, during, and after talking. Are you projecting an attitude that results in others feeling accepted and welcome? Are you encouraging people to speak and engage with you through your approachability?
The consistency of their moods and emotions creates a predictable and consistent outcome that can be reassuring in our turbulent times. You know you can depend on approachable people to be well balanced, accepting, and empathetic to the needs and feelings of others.
Having moved from Florida to Wisconsin, it has been an interesting exercise for me to attend networking events where I did not know a soul. I would silently scan the room to see who was approachable and who was not. It was those individuals who put out the approachable vibes whom I would be magnetized toward to engage in conversation.
Are you being approachable when you are around new people? Ever not know what to say? Simply smile when you make eye contact. This is a subliminal invitation to help others feel safe—allowing a conversation to follow naturally.
Welcome" is a word to use often! Leaders who maintain an open-door policy inspire trust, teamwork, and healthier communication. They are more likely to earn respect, gain buy-in, and foster collaboration.
When individuals feel comfortable approaching their leaders, their confidence to share ideas, discuss problems, and offer suggestions is strengthened. It emboldens them to take personal ownership and perform at higher levels within the organization.