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As a lifetime optimist, my first tendency has always been to look for the best in others, the best in situations, and focus on what is working rather than what is not. Noticing the good has helped me immensely in life and business and it can do the same for you.
Years ago, I read Andrew Carnegie’s metaphor "developing people is like mining gold." He shared that sometimes you must move tons of dirt to find an ounce of gold. Every one of us has dirt because we are all imperfect and fallible. However, within each of us lies a vein of gold. When you find this treasure, regardless of how small, and begin to polish it, a person will shine so brightly the dirt falls away.
Polishing the gold in others is easy to do and a valuable habit to develop to transform your relationship results. People will usually rise to the occasion and live up to your positive expectations.
Finding the good in others is mutually rewarding for both you and the fortunate recipient of your kind words. Don’t you love being around people who make you feel great about yourself? Don’t you want to do business with people who make you feel valued and important? Wouldn’t you rather work with people who appreciate and respect you? Of course you would! Now go out and do that for others! When you become a generous good-finder you will infuse positive energy, optimism, and good will into their lives, as well as your own.
Polishing the gold in others will not only make them feel better about themselves, but it will also elevate you in their eyes as well as your own. Gifting others with your words of affirmation is an easy yet generous way to spread goodwill and create a positive experience for everyone.
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . take the time to mine the gold.Actively seek the goodness in others then express your gratitude for it. Excavate the dirt, seek the treasure, and polish their gold to shine boldly and brightly. People will rise to your positive expectations and belief in them.
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Say something nice!My wise mother raised us with the philosophy that if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. That is a Southern custom if there ever was one! It is easy to find fault, criticize, condemn, and complain—but none of these behaviors will help you enjoy positive relationship results.
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Catch people doing things right:Outstanding leaders know that people will be more engaged, perform at higher levels, and be more loyal when they are appreciated and celebrated. Jeff West, international speaker and author of The Unexpected Tour Guide, shares that “People will jump over high hurdles, fight fires and break through walls for leaders who find them doing things right. Building that kind of chemistry is essential if a team is going to jell.” Capitalize on the opportunity to notice what people are doing right at work and at home and they will deliver their best. As the old saying goes, “A person who feels appreciated will always do more than expected.
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Make a list of positives:Whether you would like to nurture a healthy relationship or improve a toxic one, make a list of positives which you admire about the other person. Begin by identifying, acknowledging, and focusing on their good qualities. Your perspective and how you feel about the person will begin to shift. You will find it much easier to polish the gold from a perspective of gratitude and appreciation.
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Flip your positivity switch:What is your first instinct? If you are quick to find fault, look for the negative, or complain about another person, knock it off! It makes you less fun to be around. When you feel those negative thoughts and judgments coming in, catch yourself and STOP!
To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Brag about their accomplishments in front of others:For years, I have shared that the definition of a good friend is someone who says nice things about you behind your back. And the definition of a GREAT friend is someone who says GREAT things to others in front of you. One of the kindest things a husband or wife can do for their relationships is to brag about their partner’s qualities to other people.