I'm a big believer in first impressions," he finally said. "Tell me what your first thought was when Jason walked into the courtroom."Taylor took a sip of her drink and grinned. This one was easy. "I vowed to hate him forever."Jeremy's brown eyes twinkled at this. "That's exactly what I said nineteen years ago, five minutes after he first walked into our dorm room.
By their very nature, human beings are so capricious, so complex, so delightfully contradictory, that they deserve not only our consideration, but our reconsideration--and our unwavering determination to withhold our opinion until we have engaged with them in every possible setting at every possible hour.
Who are you anyway? What are you even doing here?”“Haven,” she said quietly, peeking at him.He gazed at her peculiarly. “Heaven? No, this definitely isn't Heaven. But I get why you’re confused, since I'm standing in front of you.” She stared at him, and hecracked a smile. “I'm kidding. Well, kinda… I have been told I've taken a girl to Heaven a time or two.”“Haven, not Heaven,” she said, louder than before. Nothing about the conversation made sense to her. “My name’s Haven.
He laughs. "No! Aguaje is for girls. If a man eats to much of it, he starts to look like a woman.""That is the most unscientific thing I've ever heard.""Then you haven't met my cousin Jacari." Eio swings the string of fruit back and forth. " Too much aguaje. Now the mothers use him as wet nurse."My mouth freezes in mid-bite, and I stare at him. "You're teasing me."A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. "Maybe.
We sometimes try to impress people we just met by not trying to impress them.
Some people wish they were as happy as or happy like some people think they are.
Think of the times in your life when you have been deeply passionate about something. Whether it is for your family, a cause, a person, an adventure, a hobby, a career, a love for music, or even going to the beach—your passion for it helps you tap into your unique personal power to live and love your life out loud.
Passionate people are great about discovering what lights their fire and going for it. They might be encouraged by others who share their passion, but they don’t rely on others to tell them what they need to do or how they need to do it.
Half of the time, the Holy Ghost tries to warn us about certain people that come into our life. The other half of the time he tries to tell us that the sick feeling we get in a situation is not the other person’s fault, rather it is our own hang-ups. A life filled with bias, hatred, judgment, insecurity, fear, delusion and self-righteousness can cloud the soul of anyone you meet. Our job is never to assume,instead it is to listen, communicate, ask questions then ask more, until we know the true depth of someone’s spirit.
When you take the high road to living a virtuous life, you are fortified by knowing that regardless of what life throws your way or what storms may rage, you are grounded in goodness. In this, you secure not only your own integrity, but you secure it in the eyes others.
7. “When a foundation is built following sound structural principles, with solid, high-quality materials, anything that is layered on top is more secure, durable, and resilient. Your integrity works the same way.
When a foundation is built following sound structural principles, with solid, high-quality materials, anything that is layered on top is more secure, durable, and resilient. Your integrity works the same way.
Our modern-day society is often so consumed with external appearances that living a virtuous life may sound boring and dull. However, the love and beauty that lies deep within the human spirit resonates with plain and simple goodness.
Have you ever known a person who was highly intelligent, yet their lack of character destroyed your impression of them? Even though they may have been accomplished, articulate, and knowledgeable, their words became impotent and irrelevant.
Making money and being prosperous is a wonderful place to be, but not at the expense of your ethics, integrity, and reputation. It is simply not worth it. It nixes any chance of creating trusted working relationships.
Authenticity respects the ebb and flow between positive and negative. The people who really know you will understand that you are not always going to be in a happy place and an occasional bad mood is acceptable.
Do you generally feel uncomfortable around people whom you perceive to be perfect? Is there really such a thing as the perfect person? Of course not! Our flaws are often what differentiates us from each other, and no person is perfect.
Authenticity isn’t just about saying “this is who I am”—it is also about being flexible enough to recognize and appreciate the uniqueness in others—honoring the mutual respect for being authentic and true.
The challenge of being authentic for people pleasers is that we really want people to like and accept us. Being vulnerable, however, requires that we come to terms with the fact that not everyone is going to like us, and that it is okay. Not everyone needs to like us.
People must believe that you are real and are who you say you are, otherwise they will not want to do business with you, much less make the effort to move forward in starting and building a relationship.
When I meet someone who is truly genuine, I am drawn to their personality and find them easier to approach, engage, and interact with. They have no hint of false pretense, nor do I worry about hidden agendas.
Have you ever been friends with a girl before?”she finally asked. “Friends?”“Yes. Friends.”“Have a beer and shoot some pool friends? Or the kind with benefits?”She laughed out loud, shook her head and grinned. “Have you ever been friends with a girl without having sex mixed into the equation?”“Not since I was sixteen,” he admitted and then felt his neck heat.
Forgetting who you are is so much more complicated than simply forgetting your name. It's also forgetting your dreams. Your aspirations. What makes you happy. What you pray you'll never have to live without. It's meeting yourself for the first time, and not being sure of your first impression.
He was the kind of man you didn’t notice at first…but then found yourself staring. There was something…something she’d never been able to put her finger on…that inspired a double, triple, quadruple look. He was forever lurking in corners with a cigarette, and seemed to draw her eyes anyway. She didn’t know if she liked him, wasn’t sure if she trusted him, and definitely was afraid – a little bit – of his eyes.
Finding a taxi, she felt like a child pressing her nose to the window of a candy store as she watched the changing vista pass by while the twilight descended and the capital became bathed in a translucent misty lavender glow. Entering the city from that airport was truly unique. Charles de Gaulle, built nineteen miles north of the bustling metropolis, ensured that the final point of destination was veiled from the eyes of the traveller as they descended. No doubt, the officials scrupulously planned the airport’s location to prevent the incessant air traffic and roaring engines from visibly or audibly polluting the ambience of their beloved capital, and apparently, they succeeded. If one flew over during the summer months, the visitor would be visibly presented with beautifully managed quilt-like fields of alternating gold and green appearing as though they were tilled and clipped with the mathematical precision of a slide rule. The countryside was dotted with quaint villages and towns that were obviously under meticulous planning control. When the aircraft began to descend, this prevailing sense of exactitude and order made the visitor long for an aerial view of the capital city and its famous wonders, hoping they could see as many landmarks as they could before they touched ground, as was the usual case with other major international airports, but from this point of entry, one was denied a glimpse of the city below. Green fields, villages, more fields, the ground grew closer and closer, a runway appeared, a slight bump or two was felt as the craft landed, and they were surrounded by the steel and glass buildings of the airport. Slightly disappointed with this mysterious game of hide-and-seek, the voyager must continue on and collect their baggage, consoled by the reflection that they will see the metropolis as they make their way into town. For those travelling by road, the concrete motorway with its blue road signs, the underpasses and the typical traffic-logged hubbub of industrial areas were the first landmarks to greet the eye, without a doubt, it was a disheartening first impression. Then, the real introduction began. Quietly, and almost imperceptibly, the modern confusion of steel and asphalt was effaced little by little as the exquisite timelessness of Parisian heritage architecture was gradually unveiled. Popping up like mushrooms were cream sandstone edifices filigreed with curled, swirling carvings, gently sloping mansard roofs, elegant ironwork lanterns and wood doors that charmed the eye, until finally, the traveller was completely submerged in the glory of the Second Empire ala Baron Haussmann’s master plan of city design, the iconic grand mansions, tree-lined boulevards and avenues, the quaint gardens, the majestic churches with their towers and spires, the shops and cafés with their colourful awnings, all crowded and nestled together like jewels encrusted on a gold setting.
Focusing your energy on the things you don’t like about yourself is self-sabotage and defeating. When you re-direct all that energy into a more positive direction, you will feel the shift instantly to improve your self-esteem and attitude.
Wouldn’t you rather have the respect of your friends and colleagues than succumb to pressure to do and say things that are out of character in order to feel accepted? You can overcome this habit simply by learning to say “no.
What we often forget is that most everyone else has dealt with the same struggles and uncertainties. You get to pick your response when this doubt creeps in. Will you allow it to undermine your confidence, or instead, choose to look at it objectively?
When you have a healthy self-esteem, qualities such as likeability, confidence, trustworthiness, compassion, sense of humor, empathy, and optimism all serve to make you more interesting and successful. But unfortunately, we sometimes get in our own way . . .
I can . . . I can't. How do you speak to yourself? Do you ever feel as though you have an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other? And they continually argue over your self-worth, competence, and personal value? Which one usually wins the debate?
The voice of the inner critic is mean, unforgiving, punishing, and downright hurtful. When you allow it to run roughshod over your happiness and emotional well-being, it can wreak havoc on your peace of mind and leave you feeling anxious, fearful, and depleted.
Demoralizing self-talk leads to a self-destructive mindset, making everything in life more difficult. Not only that, how you feel about yourself oozes out of your pores and makes a bad impression on others.
You and I may have never met, but I already know so much of what you want: to be happy and feel valued. We all want love, connection, respect, confidence, health, vitality, passion, kindness, and success.
You and I may have never met, but I already know much of what you want in your life: to be happy and feel valued. We all want love, connection, respect, confidence, health, vitality, passion, kindness, and success.
15. “We all want to be happy and feel valued. We want love, connection, respect, confidence, health, vitality, passion, kindness, and success. When you generously provide these emotions for others, you activate the law of attraction to magnetize the same experiences for you.
We all want to be happy and feel valued. We want love, connection, respect, confidence, health, vitality, passion, kindness, and success. When you generously provide these emotions for others, you activate the law of attraction to magnetize the same experiences for you.
Many people have never discovered the power generated from a heart of service. They show up to life projecting a right of entitlement in which their needs are their first priority and they will do whatever it takes to forward their own agenda without any concern for how it impacts others. This behavior pushes people away, creates barriers to trust and communication, and leaves a bad impression.
If you’re always taking, you will inevitably experience resistance and struggle. Without realizing it, you may be creating a firewall that is blocking you from receiving exactly the things you most desire.
Speakers, coaches, consultants, thought-leaders, experts, and authors who dedicate their professional lives for the love of humanity and the betterment of society are making a positive difference in the lives of millions. These messengers of hope make our entire world a better place through their love and generosity.
Dignity is a quiet strength which reflects your deep honor and self-respect. It is a gracious pride without narcissistic projection and portrays a calm awareness and generosity of spirit regardless of the environment or circumstances.
You will be stuck with you for the rest of your life so learn to be your own best friend. Take a moment, look at yourself in the mirror, and say, “I love you.” It feels awkward at first. Do it anyway. Begin a great friendship with YOU!
In spite of the circumstance, a person who abides in dignity and grace will use the lessons learned as ballast for their ship as they sail through stormy waters—taking the wisdom gained from life and using it to anchor their confidence.
Gracious pride is a powerful motivator and an exceptional quality. It drives a person to strive for excellence, keep promises, not give up, be more resilient, maintain optimism, and hold their head high while enduring challenge and change.
Grace is an attitude of generosity toward our fellow humans. We are not easily offended and do not look to judge and label others. With a spirit of graciousness, we are amiable, benevolent, and charitable.
A first impression works like a magic mirror; it reflects what intrigues us rather than echoing a truthful picture. A first impression is the creating of an imagined character born from personal desires, perceptions, and biases. Though sparked by an introduction to a real, living, breathing individual, the person remains a mystery long after parting. It is a fictitious ghost masked with similar features that remains. A first impression is rarely accurate; therefore, it should never be trusted.
Confidence is not a goal or a final ending point where you arrive and then stop once you reach it. Rather, it is the satisfaction and reward you achieve by stretching to, and beyond, the best of your abilities.
Building self-confidence is like building a muscle. Your confidence grows in response to your intensity of usage and the level of performance you require from it. If you don’t use it, you may lose it. Stretch, flex, life, and build!
If you want to appear more confident—speak slowly, articulately, clearly, and deliberately. Communicating with clarity will not only help you build more confidence in yourself, but it will inspire respect from others.
When they are authentically engaged, their positive impressions create memorable moments and leave a lasting impact. Physical beauty becomes irrelevant because their exuberance and engagement bring out the beauty in you.
Their engaging manner is grounded in consideration as they seek to get along well with others. People who exhibit charisma and charm are also said to be alluring, bewitching, captivating, magnetic, fascinating, enchanting, and seductive.
There are differing opinions as to whether charisma and charm are innate qualities which we are born with or learned personality styles. I believe it is a combination of both. Young children demonstrate a propensity for this enthusiasm. However, smart adults realize that they can get further in life when they develop these special traits.
These people do exist and are a pleasure to know. Their keen communication skills are attentive to what you want, what you are thinking, saying, or not saying. They want to hear how you are and what you’ve been up to.
While it may seem to be a mysterious, ineffable quality—charisma is enhanced and enriched by a person’s attitude and confidence, their aims and optimism, expressive body language, and natural effervescence.
True confidence is not something that can always be determined by a first impression. It may take a few interactions to detect whether a person is full of false bravado or if they are the "real McCoy.
In our natural world, it is the strongest of the species that claim their space, seek out new territories, explore their surroundings, and learn how to survive and thrive. It is those same qualities that enable us to apply confidence and command to transcend the mediocre and achieve outstanding results.
When your inner critic undermines your confidence, inner conflict, anxiety, and agitation take over. It tells you that you are not good enough, smart enough, handsome enough, worthy enough, or basically just plain NOT enough. It takes a toll on your self-confidence, doesn’t it?
That's when I caught my first glimpse of Blaine Crabtree. He was sandwiched in between two guys that were laughing at who knows what. At first I didn't notice anything but a big mop of bleached blonde hair, then he looked up from his pack of cloves and I was locked into the bluest eyes that I had ever seen. His expression didn't change, he didn't smile and didn't blink. It seemed like I was lost in his eyes, like he was using them to do the most calculated math problem, and that math problem was me.
He looks at me and then, reverting to the voice he'd used with Kendra, says, 'If homegirls wanna see me as ghetto trash'--he stops and switches to his lispy, sassy voice--'or big-ass queer'--now he switches to his deepest Shakespeare voice--'I shall not take it upon myself to disabuse them.
Some people look like they sound better than they actually sound, because they look confident and have good posture," once musician, a veteran of many auditions, says. "Other people look awful when they play but sound great. Other people have that belabored look when they play, but you can't hear it in the sound. There is always this dissonance between what you see and hear" (p.251).