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I've tried reading the Bible. I never make it past all the talk about the firmament. The firmament is the thing, on Day 1 or 2, that divides the waters from the waters. Here you have the firmament. Next to the firmament, the waters. Stay with the waters long enough, presumably you hit another stretch of firmament. I can't say for sure: at the first mention of the firmament, I start bleeding tears of terminal boredom. I grow restless. I flick ahead. It appears to go like this: firmament, superlong middle part, Jesus. You could spend half your life reading about the barren wives and the kindled wraths and all the rest of it before you got to the do-unto-others part, which as I understand it is the high-water mark.

Joshua Ferris
bible funny jesus firmament

The telescope destroyed the firmament, did away with the heaven of the New Testament, rendered the ascension of our Lord and the assumption of his Mother infinitely absurd, crumbled to chaos the gates and palaces of the New Jerusalem, and in their places gave to man a wilderness of worlds.

Robert G. Ingersoll , em Some Mistakes of Moses
heaven bible absurd science jesus lord chaos science-vs-religion science-and-religion new-testament the-bible jerusalem mary virgin-mary ascension telescope firmament bible-vs-science new-jerusalem

It doesnot matter; there’s many a heavenly body in the lot crowding upon us ofa night that mankind had never heard of, it being outside the sphereof its activities and of no earthly importance to anybody but to theastronomers who are paid to talk learnedly about its composition,weight, path--the irregularities of its conduct, the aberrations of itslight--a sort of scientific scandal-mongering.

Joseph Conrad , em Lord Jim
hope stars sky astronomy infinite lights psalm-19-1 firmament astral-bodies

The rain thundered down so heavily that Pritam could imagine that space itself was made of water and was pouring through rents in the sky's tired fabric.

Stephen M. Irwin , em The Dead Path
rain weather storm flooding downpour firmament

...please don’t throw any more rocks at the barrier keeping the demonic hordes of the void from pouring over the world.

Garon Whited , em Nightlord Orb
demons void barrier rocks firmament

In the firmament of science Mayer and Joule constitute a double star, the light of each being in a certain sense complementary to that of the other.

John Tyndall
science star praise firmament james-joule james-prescott-joule joule mayer robert-mayer

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