Just as your body has self-regulating mechanisms, like perspiring to cool you down and shivering to warm you up, you can regulate your emotions according to the circumstances. You can abstain from over-reacting, and you know how to set boundaries and how to say "no.
Emotionally intelligent people have the capacity to understand and express their own emotions—you are in touch with your strengths and weaknesses and realize where you might like to make improvements”.
The Art of First Impressions for Positive Impact is based on the premise that when you become self-aware and learn how to shine bright as your best self, you can transform your relationships in life and in business.
Absolutely everything associated with your success is relationship based and emotionally connected. Developing your emotional intelligence is one of the wisest action you can take for personal and professional transformation.
Haven’t you known people who seem to have a “sixth sense” super-power when it comes to connecting, communicating, and understanding others? These emotionally intelligent people always know the right things to say to make us feel that we matter.
Palm Reading 101• Palm Up— Conveys openness, service, humility, and sympathy.• Palm Down—Demonstrates authority, superiority, and control.• Palm Vertical—Shows you are meeting on equal terms with a mutually respectful greeting.• Palm Wet, Cold, or Clammy—Ick! The "dead fish" is creepy. Make your hands warm and dry before reaching out to touch someone, please! It can also be conveyed as being nervous or over-excited.• Palm Perfect—This is my favorite. Better known as the "hand hug." While you are shaking hands with your right hand, place your left hand on top, wrapping both people in warmth and trust. This two-handed shake illustrates affection, caring, or concern, especially when you then reach up to grasp their arm or shoulder.
High fives and fist bumps have become the popular alternatives to traditional handshakes, especially among the younger generations. As a new social norm, they are used as a greeting, an approval, an acknowledgement, a celebration, and a gesture of understanding. High fives and fist bumps are also viewed as a healthier alternative to traditional handshakes because they don’t spread germs.
Considerations & Exceptions for Impressive Handshakes• Be mindful of a person’s age; be tender with arthritic hands. In that case, a loose and gentler handshake is a gesture of sensitivity and compassion.• Show interest; even if your right hand is full, offer your left hand. • Demonstrate respect when you are caught in an introduction while seated; try to stand. • Be instinctive about when to allow the length of your handshake to linger to express unity, connection, or sympathy.
All hugs are not created equal. Some people are naturally gifted in showering others with warmth and affection. They can hug with such a sincere intention it transcends a handshake. Their hugs feel genuine, non-threatening, and are emotionally consistent with the relationship they share with the "hugee.
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Brian is a deeply compassionate man who was sad to learn that his work colleague, Tom, had lost his 17-year-old daughter to a drug overdose. When Tom returned to work weeks later, Brian approached him and said, “Man, I am so sorry. There are no words to express my condolences.“Brian reached out to hug Tom. At first, he was rigid and on guard, but with Brian’s genuine embrace, he felt Tom release into his safety. Tom had been so incredibly strong for his wife and family that Brian’s powerful hug allowed him to surrender into another man’s strength. It was a memorable and powerful step towards healing. Sometimes a hug at the right time, even if spontaneous, can be the kindest thing you can do for another human being.
Hugging is quite an intimate contact. Considering the studies done on proxemics we looked at earlier; when you get within two feet of another person you are inside their intimate space. There are some people who truly do not want you in their 'bubble' unless you are close friends or they’ve given you permission. Assuming familiarity incorrectly can destroy rapport, make a bad impression, and risk everything you have done well up to then.
Look for all of the possible missteps in the following scenario. My friend Amy arrived at a consultation with her Hispanic business partner. The African American woman to whom they were delivering their presentation was a long-time friend of her partner’s. Her partner was greeted with a hug and Amy was greeted with a handshake. The meeting was a great success.As it came to a close, the two friends hugged. With enthusiastic affection, Amy went to hug the African American client. The woman took a step, turned her shoulder to block the hug, and looked at Amy with dismissive anger. It was almost a defensive move. Her partner, recognizing this, put her arm around Amy to soften the situation and make light of the inappropriate gesture. Everything turned out fine, but Amy was baffled by the barrier. She was confused by the woman’s reaction since their interaction had been cordial and positive. She wondered if she had been socially insensitive or culturally inappropriate. After much reflection, however, she realized that she had simply been too quick to assume familiarity. Thankfully, she earned and learned the lesson quickly to become more aware. Amy eventually earned the trust of her client and secured her valuable business.
Physical touch is one of my primary love languages. For those of us who share this love language, touching is an endearing gesture of affection, appreciation, and connection. It is not intended to be inappropriate in any way when we hug you upon meeting, pat your back, or squeeze your arm. For us, it is an enthusiastic demonstration of friendship. However, there are many people who do NOT like to be touched—men or women. In spite of our good intentions, touching can make others feel awkward, offended, and in the worst-case scenario, violated. It is crucial to be vigilant and socially aware enough that you can read people’s cues to know when to pull back and contain yourself.
Confession. Years ago, I was invited to a cocktail party for an Asian-American networking group. As I introduced myself to a Japanese businessman, I reached out and firmly shook his hand. Much to my embarrassment now, I automatically took my other hand and wrapped our hands in a “hand hug.” This is a common gesture of friendship in the South. As his wife approached, however, she appeared appalled and felt disrespected that I was touching her husband. Our cultural differences were marked. Despite this cultural mishap, I was able to redeem myself. We all moved past it and delighted in an interesting conversation. Physical touch is a touchy topic (pun intended), especially when various cultures are involved.
Seek to make others feel comfortable by demonstrating respect for their individual needs as well as their cultural norms. Your consideration and heightened awareness will guide you well—and help you make a great first impression.
Approachability. Being warm and inviting demonstrates comfort, care, and emotional safety all of which encourages engagement. Your openness says, “I’m happy to meet you and am glad you’re here.
Smiling and Expressions of Emotion. A genuine smile is inviting, contagious, and encouraging. People do read a book by its cover and your expressions provide a glimpse for what they’ll find inside.
Eye Contact. Direct eye contact is one of the best compliments you can give to another. You are subliminally telling them that you are listening, they matter, and that what they have to say is important.
Energy & Aura. You release your own distinctive energy signature which naturally produces a physical presence. When you emit positive energy, thoughts, feelings, and vibrations, you attract more positives into your life.
Become aware of the physical distance and spatial orientation that you experience while in the company of others. Being empathetic and sensitive to a person’s physical comfort zone can have a huge effect on the way in which you are received and perceived.
I have a few friends who are confined to wheelchairs for access and mobility. I don't want to always be looking down at them while they are looking up at me. To enjoy a meaningful conversation, I’m quick to kneel beside them or pull up a chair to talk at the same height. Begin to recognize the orientation of other people and align yourself with their body position and physical needs so that you may connect on a more balanced and effective level.
The Warm Welcome of Hospitality. Walt Disney World is the epitome of world-class customer service. Employees must be hyper-vigilant of spatial orientation to engage, impress, and interact with guests. For simply being near a guest, employees are trained to:• Make eye contact and smile.• Greet and welcome each and every guest.• Seek out guest contact.• Provide immediate service recovery.• Always display appropriate body language.• Preserve the “magical” guest experience.• Thank each guest and demonstrate that appreciation.
Many hospitality companies follow the "5 and 10 Rule," whereby when a customer is within ten feet of the employee, they should provide acknowledgement with eye contact and a genuine smile. When the customer is within five feet, it is encouraged to provide a warm welcome, sincere greeting, a friendly gesture, and offer to help, or to engage him or her in conversation.
In the legend of Camelot, King Arthur gave consideration as to how his knights might be positioned spatially to impart a message of power and status. He decided they would have their meetings at a round table, which meant that they were all considered equal and there was no “head of the table.” He built a league based on equality and mutual respect to unify and fortify the power of teamwork.
When you are sitting behind a desk with a person on the other side, there is a barrier between you that becomes a psychological and subliminal message. Some of the best leaders I know have a round table or a circle of chairs in their offices so that when people come in to speak with them, the arrangement lends itself to more engaging interaction. Using a roundtable in which there is no head fosters collaboration, cooperation, mutual respect, and equal positioning.
When having lunch or dinner at a long rectangular table, I prefer to take a middle chair so that I can turn to my left or to my right to make meaningful conversation with the people in attendance. When I have been seated at the very end, it can prove to be difficult to speak, hear, and connect with everyone there. Think ahead, and whenever possible, put yourself in the middle of the action!
Proxemics is the study of human use of space and the effects that population density has on behavior, social interaction, and communication. Imagine invisible bubbles around every person that provides each of us with comfort zones for social engagement and interaction.
In 1966, American anthropologist Edward T. Hall specified four distinct distance zones to describe the perception of physical space around us. Understanding these zones and honoring their invisible boundaries will give you a sixth sense about another person’s “space” as well as your own.Intimate Zone (less than 2’) —This zone represents our personal space and is reserved for the most trusted and loved people in our lives. Touching, hugging, standing side by side, and engaging in private conversations is common and encouraged. When an interloper violates this personal space, great discomfort and awkwardness can be created. What to do? Take a step back or sideways.Personal Zone (2’-4’) —This is the distance for interaction with good friends, family, social gatherings, or parties. It's an easy and relaxed space for talking, shaking hands, gesturing, laughing and making faces. Social Zone (4’-12') —This zone seems to be an appropriate distance for casual friends, colleagues, and acquaintances to interact. It is the comfortable distance we maintain while interacting or addressing large groups of people.Public Zone (over 12’) —This is the distance we keep from strangers or persons with little acquaintance. It provides the greatest distance between people. This is a safe space that still allows us to experience community and belonging with new people.
As you seek new opportunities to make favorable first impressions, be ever aware of the subtle effect that physical positioning and distance/closeness can have on your interactions with others and use this understanding to your advantage.
As you navigate the various zones with people, a variety of specific physical and psychological responses is elicited from them. Until you know someone, avoid invading his or her personal space. Getting closer gradually demonstrates that you like the other person. This gradual and comfortable approach begins the circle of rapport—he sees that you like him, he likes that you like him, and he reciprocates by liking you back.
As you navigate the various zones with people, a variety of specific physical and psychological responses are elicited from them. Until you know someone, avoid invading his or her personal space. Getting closer gradually demonstrates that you like the other person. This gradual and comfortable approach begins the circle of rapport—he sees that you like him, he likes that you like him, and he reciprocates by liking you back.
To touch or not to touch . . . that is the question. Handshakes, hugs, and other touching all have their appropriate space and place. The key to success in this area is to know when, where, and how to best put these into action.
What is acceptable on a personal level is very different from what is acceptable on a business level. When we utilize touch well, we can elevate our presentation, demonstrate respect, and convey confidence. However, when we use touch poorly, it can be disastrous, personally and professionally.
Research by the Income Center for Tradeshows found that people are twice as likely to remember you if you shake hands. According to the American Management Association, it takes only one-fortieth of a second to create a human bond. Whether you shake someone’s hand, squeeze their arm, or touch their shoulder, make these moments count to be remembered favorably.
A person who offers a loose handshake, on the other hand (pun intended), may be interpreted as being uninterested, lacking confidence and self-esteem, weak, or being wishy-washy. Whether too strong or too weak, a bad handshake can set you back and close down a potentially rewarding relationship before it ever gets started.
A simple handshake is not always a simple handshake. The way it is delivered can take on a million meanings and interpretations. As with every other form of body language and non-verbal communication, you are sending silent messages simply by the way you shake hands.
Your handshake has the power to reveal your strength of character, make a promise, demonstrate your level of respect, exercise your etiquette, and represent your business acumen. Learning how to do it well will take you far in life and in business.
A strong handshake conveys confidence, clarity, strength, and intention. As with everything else in life, if it is overzealous, it may be seen as aggressive, arrogant, or dominating. A bone-crushing vice-grip is just plain obnoxious and one of the fastest ways to make someone angry.
What does a solid, comfortable, impressive handshake look and feel like? To deliver a great handshake . . . • Extend your right hand out vertically at a comfortable waist level toward the person you are meeting.• Connect hands with web to web contact made between the thumb and index finger. • Be intentional and appropriate by showing mutual respect and teamwork.• Gently squeeze firmly enough to be confident, yet lightly enough to be gracious. Shake a few times for good measure.• Discreetly rotate your wrist so that your hand is slightly on top of theirs when you want to subconsciously convey self-assurance.• Make eye contact and smile to show sincerity. Throw in an acknowledging head nod for good measure. Avoiding eye contact may be interpreted that you are not attentive or have something to hide.• Introduce yourself and when they share their name, repeat it back to them to help you remember it. “It is nice to meet you John.”• When in doubt, mirror their handshake to adapt to what makes them feel comfortable. Customize accordingly to the gender, age, position, personality, and culture of the person you are meeting.
To cultivate bravery and courage, reduce uncertainty by being prepared. As Zig Ziglar once said, “Success happens when opportunity meets preparation.” Preparing well for potential outcomes will provide you with a safety net if there is a hiccup, glitch, or temporary setback.
To cultivate bravery and courage, practice, practice, practice. Each time you test your bravery you grow your self-assurance and increase your comfort to a greater degree. Repetition helps build confidence and competence. You did it; now do it again!
To cultivate bravery and courage, Do It Scared. Being scared is a precursor to bravery, otherwise, it wouldn’t be bravery, would it? Mustering the courage to stretch beyond your familiar territory is a rewarding act in itself.
To cultivate bravery and courage, may the Force be with you. Whether you fortify yourself with a positive mental attitude, affirmations, faith in God, prayer, and meditation, or an innate sense of personal destiny, you have the power to summon your courage and be brave. “Make it so, Number One!
And as is often the case, the people who would benefit the most from reading a book like this are the ones least likely to buy and read it. For you, however, this chapter will serve as a sterling reminder to make your manners shine.
While good old-fashioned manners and etiquette have worked for centuries, new standards and expectations have come into play with the modern world. Behaviors which would have been appalling in the past are now socially acceptable.
Regardless of the trends we see in the deterioration of morality, respect, and values, wise people will still strive to take the high road to rise above the ever-increasing rudeness and stand apart from the crowd.
I remember hearing years ago about a centenarian being interviewed on her birthday. She was asked, “Throughout your life, you have witnessed amazing change and innovation. The past one-hundred years have brought the inventions of the car, television, air conditioning, and microwave ovens. What is the most extraordinary change you have seen in your lifetime?” Without missing a beat, she replied, “That a teenager can say “suck” in front of their parents and get away with it!” While cultural norms may have changed with the times, being considerate of fellow human beings is not an antiquated notion; its time hasn't ended. Quite the opposite is true. In our world today, kindness and politeness are needed more than ever.
The elegance of etiquette is a timeless expression of class which transcends social status, demographics, educational level, and ethnicity. Good manners say more about you than the person who is on the receiving end.
Take the initiative with deliberate steps to be a polite person:1. Cover your mouth when you cough or sneeze.2. Reciprocate a thoughtful word or a good deed in kind.3. Say "excuse me" when you bump into someone, unintentionally violate someone’s space, or need to get someone’s attention.4. Apologize when you’ve made a mistake or are in the wrong.5. Live by the "Golden Rule" and treat others the way you would like to be treated.6. When dining at home or in a restaurant, wait until everyone is served before eating your meal.7. Acknowledge notable events like birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries.
Take the initiative with deliberate steps to be a polite person:1. Cover your mouth when you cough or sneeze.2. Reciprocate a thoughtful word or a good deed in kind.3. Say "excuse me" when you bump into someone, unintentionally violate someone’s space, or need to get someone’s attention.4. Apologize when you’ve made a mistake or are in the wrong.5. Live by the "Golden Rule" and treat others the way you would like to be treated.6. When dining at home or in a restaurant, wait until everyone is served before eating your meal.7. Acknowledge notable events like birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries.8. Reply to invitations, regardless of whether you will be able to attend. 9. Acknowledge and show gratitude for gifts and gestures of hospitality.10. Put things back where they belong. Leave the world a better place than how you found it.
What is appropriate in one setting may be entirely inappropriate in another. How you behave at a football game is different than how you behave at your sister’s wedding. How you interact with your closest friends will be different than how you engage with your boss.
For more than forty years, Judith Martin has inspired the world with advice on etiquette excellence, proper behavior, and codes of conduct through her critically acclaimed newspaper column, “Miss Manners.” In an interview for her book, Miss Manners Minds Your Business, Mrs. Martin reminds us that “When you go to work, you want a degree of professionalism which does not involve hearing about all of the sordid details of a person’s love life. We are not necessarily all friends, but have a job that needs to be done. A work friend is not always a social friend. One requires distance while the other embraces intimacy.
As our society has become more casual, the line between a person’s personal life and professional life has become blurred, especially with the advent of social media. Personal information, your manners (or lack thereof), opinions, and pictures of your private life are available for all the world to see. HR directors, recruiters, and potential employers will often ascertain a person’s manners and moral compass from their online presence.
How a person treats wait staff speaks volumes about their character and values. If they misbehave in this scenario, you can likely predict how they will react when cut off in traffic, when their luggage is lost, or when life doesn’t go their way. It is also an indicator to CEOs and hiring managers as to whether a person is a viable candidate for being a considerate team player.
It is unimpressive to not hold a door open for the next person coming through. After a satisfying workout at my gym, I was walking behind a man who was exiting at the same time. He was only about two feet in front of me. As he walked through the door, he let it close behind him, almost hitting me in the face. Was he being intentionally rude? Was he preoccupied and focused on other things? No matter whether an offender is being a jerk intentionally, or is simply oblivious to how his behavior is affecting others, rude behavior instantly makes a negative impression. Be aware!
It is unimpressive to interrupt another person while they are talking. Interrupting someone in mid-sentence demonstrates that your focus is on yourself, not the person talking. I had a friend who used a humorous retort whenever someone would interrupt him. He would graciously, albeit sarcastically, say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to speak while you were interrupting.” It always got a laugh, yet he was cleverly letting the intruder know of his infraction without being too confrontational.
It is unimpressive to speaking rudely to others. Often, all we need to do to ensure that we do not launch into a rude remark is to pause . . . breathe . . . and smile to ourselves before speaking.And when people are rude to you, just remember that they are revealing who they are, not who you are. Don’t take it personally. Sometimes being silent is your best response.
I am a very lucky lady that my life partner, Daniel, is a true-blue Southern gentleman. Watching him in action not only earns my love and respect, but it also strengthens his countenance and bolsters his reputation as a man. As a health care provider, he treats numerous patients who are elderly or in pain. Daniel has made it a customary ritual while people are in his care to help them with their coats, provide a stabilizing arm, carry the ladies’ purses, and even walk patients out to their cars. While this kindness provides extraordinary customer service, it also demonstrates that small acts of chivalry can make a significant impact on one’s reputation, first impression, and overall human-beingness.
A man worth his salt will treat a lady like a lady and make the effort to be a gentleman. While independent women are fully capable of being self-reliant, the majority whom I know appreciate being treated with respect, consideration, and chivalry. For the women who yearn for the old-fashioned, good-hearted, chivalrous guy, I promise, they do exist.
It is unimpressive to not return what’s been borrowed. Whether you have borrowed money, folding chairs, yard tools, or a popular book, always make sure you return to another person what is rightfully theirs. Lending it to you in the first place was a gift of trust and assistance. Being slow to give back in return may be considered rude.
While you will certainly attract more bees with honey, there are times when being nice can backfire. Take it from a naturally kind person, being a “bitch” has its time and place. There will be times when you must engage with mean, rude, and inconsiderate people.
Being Nice Has Its Limitations. While you will certainly attract more bees with honey, there are times when being nice can backfire. Take it from a naturally kind person, being a “bitch” has its time and place. There will be times when you must engage with mean, rude, and inconsiderate people.
4 Times to Get Tough . . .1. Self-Respect—You don’t have to take everything on the chin and lose the respect of yourself and others in the process. Don’t be a doormat or a pushover by allowing people to disrespect or run over you. Stand firm in your beliefs and values.2. Self-Preservation—Understand and set boundaries. Decide what is and what is not acceptable in how people treat you. Claim your power to live life on your terms and not at the whims of others’ unreasonable requests and demands. 3. Protecting others—If you are a parent of a child or a caretaker of the elderly or disabled, it is your moral duty to defend them to the end. 4. Self-Defense—Have you ever felt threatened, unsafe, or abused because of another’s behavior? Assert yourself and do whatever is necessary to ensure your safety. Being kind DOES NOT mean you should excuse such behavior.
Some people not only burn their bridges, but they also torch the town! With all their deeds of drama and destruction, they leave behind an aftermath of distrust, disrespect, and disappointment. And for what? This behavior creates immeasurable suffering in all directions. It ruins reputations and business deals, shatters lives—and closes doors which can never be re-opened. These repercussions can be prevented or avoided by simply BEING NICE.
Kindness is a powerful bridge builder which unifies teams, bonds friends, supports loved ones, and spreads goodwill. Tending to your bridges will fortify your relationships in such way that you will keep your invitations coming and your options open for future opportunities.
Whoever came up with the idea that "nice guys finish last" must have been either very jaded or downright malicious. Why would a caring, emotionally healthy human being ever think that being “un-nice” is a virtue? Anyone who wants to get ahead in life and have quality outcomes needs to understand that kindness is a strength. You will move forward faster by making friends rather than foes.
17 Ways to Just Be Nice“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” ―Aesop1. Be sincere.2. Be altruistic.3. Practice patience.4. Inquire and engage.5. Keep your promises.6. Offer help to others.7. Acknowledge others.8. Control your behavior.9. Be situationally aware.10. Be polite and courteous.11. Use considerate manners.12. Greet people with a smile. 13. Practice random acts of kindness.14. Show respect for yourself and others.15. Be complimentary and look for positives.16. Walk in another’s shoes to understand their needs.17. Share of yourself without expecting anything in return.
Stepping out and stepping up can be an intimidating experience, especially in social situations where the outcomes are unpredictable and uncertain. Have you ever been reluctant to . . . • Say "no?"• Request help?• Ask for a raise?• Stand up to a bully?• Talk about tough topics?• Confront a friend or spouse?• Speak up and share your opinion?• Begin a conversation with a stranger?• Deliver a presentation or speak in public?• Talk about the “white elephant” in the room?• Befriend people who are much different than you?• Make sales calls because you don’t want to be rejected?• Approach a new group of people at a networking event?• Go to an event by yourself where you did not know anyone?
Stepping out and stepping up can be an intimidating experience, especially in social situations where the outcomes are unpredictable and uncertain. Have you ever been reluctant to . . . • Say "no?"• Request help?• Ask for a raise?• Stand up to a bully?• Talk about tough topics?• Confront a friend or spouse?• Speak up and share your opinion?• Begin a conversation with a stranger?• Deliver a presentation or speak in public?• Talk about the “white elephant” in the room?• Befriend people who are much different than you?• Make sales calls because you don’t want to be rejected?• Approach a new group of people at a networking event?• Go to an event by yourself where you did not know anyone?Each of these scenarios can strike fear in the hearts of many because each involves risk and potential discomfort. Life holds endless circumstances with a broad and diverse range of challenge or conflict that require you to be brave.
What is easy for one person may be terrifying for another. Not all people have developed an unshakable confidence to kick butt and conquer. How can meek and quiet wallflowers, both women and men, join the ranks of the risk takers and event shakers? The first step is to ask yourself how you may be feeling stuck and then get moving.
If you like the relationship results you have been getting and don’t see any need for improvement, your status quo may actually be your sweet spot for comfort and contentment. That is a wonderful place to be.However, if you are like most of us, staying stuck in your status quo may prevent you from striving, thriving, and growing in your relationship possibilities.
I was once hired by an organization to deliver a workshop on networking. The goal was to provide their engineers with tools and strategies for expanding their circles of influence—to foster innovation, collaboration, and teambuilding. One of the engineers raised her hand in the middle of the program and bluntly said, “I’m happy with the people in my life and don’t care to add any more.” I respect and appreciate her position and have sometimes felt the same way.But, as long as we are alive, we will meet, greet, and interact with new people. Even if we are not inviting them into our personal lives, being socially brave will open new doors which may have remained closed otherwise.
Fear is the number one reason why people do not take action. The divine irony is that most of the fears we experience are self-generated and born out of our own imaginings, hence the acronym False Evidence Appearing Real.
Every one of us, at some time or another, has allowed fear to prevent us from living our best possible life. The first step in conquering our fears is to identify and confront them. Among the most common are:• Failure• Success• Being rejected• Looking stupid• Financial insecurity• Falling on your face• Being vulnerable• Appearing weak or unhealthy• Exposing your secrets• Being alone or unloved• Upsetting the status quo• Disappointing others
To cultivate bravery and courage, ground yourself in your character values:Building a solid foundation of integrity and character will fortify your confidence to face down fears and take bold action.
To cultivate bravery and courage, interview brave people and learn their secrets.Whom do you know that displays courage and confidence? Ask them for their best practices, mimic their actions, follow their steps, utilize their methods. Ask if they will mentor you.
To cultivate bravery and courage, borrow courage.There is inspiration all around you in the form of people who are living your dreams, achieving similar goals, and already succeeding. Knowing that something can be done is often half the battle. Most successful people find great reward in helping others reach for goals.
To cultivate bravery and courage, get involved in a cause you are passionate about.Serving a vision bigger than yourself changes your focus from self-doubt to whatever action is necessary for the vision to succeed. “When in doubt, take it out.
To cultivate bravery and courage, change your attitude toward failure. Many successful people will tell you that if you aren’t failing, you aren’t trying—that failure is an essential precursor to achieving worthwhile endeavors. Failing (no matter how hard) is one of life’s best teachers for winning the next time.
To cultivate bravery and courage, start small. Taking small, consistent steps for calculated risks will help you test your footing. Once you begin enjoying mini-victories, you will be able to build upon your small successes to escalate momentum and strengthen your courage to take bigger ones.
To cultivate bravery and courage, build upon your strengths and talents. What are you good at? What makes you feel confident and personally powerful? Your competencies will ground you and build your strength.
To cultivate bravery and courage, try something new for the first time. Take a chance. Stretch beyond your familiar limits by taking risks that move you out of your old mindset and into a new perspective. Once accomplished, trying something new bolsters your confidence and boosts your ability to be brave.
Life rewards action. To get from where you are now to where you want to be requires forward movement and momentum. Although you may already know what it takes to bridge the gap, simply knowing what to do is not enough.
Action is the key to creating the changes needed to propel you toward your chosen outcomes and help you achieve your relationship goals. How are you allocating your time, energy, and activities to ‘activate your awesome’ and contribute to making a positive first impression?
Nice is a little word with a big meaning. How many times did your mother say, "Just be nice?" It's basic manners, yet in our negative world today people often neglect to extend random acts of kindness and simple acts of courtesy.
It is no mystery why nice people are well-liked and get along harmoniously with others. Being nice makes people feel emotionally safe, allowing for more authentic, trusting, and happy interactions.
Google Proves Nice Counts. On a quest to discover what it takes to build the "perfect team," Google launched the Project Aristotle initiative to find the answers. Over a period of several years, they surveyed hundreds of teams, conducted interviews, analyzed studies, and observed how team members interacted with one another.Google’s findings revealed that "psychological safety" is the key ingredient for creating a high-functioning team. It nurtures a healthy environment that encourages freedom of expression, engaging communication, empathy for one another, caring, support, respect and, drum roll please . . . BEING NICE!
Benefits of Being Nice • You set positive karma into motion.• What you give is what you get back in return.• You are more likable.• People will treat you better.• You will reduce personal stress.• You will make friends more easily.• You can improve someone else’s day.• You will have less drama in your life.• It takes less energy than being otherwise.• It makes you a more valuable team player.• You create a sense of emotional safety for others.• It can keep you physically and psychologically safe.• You set a positive example for others to play nicely.• You will build bridges of cooperation and collaboration.• You will improve personal and professional interactions• Lastly, being nice feels nice!
In the hit movie, “Pay It Forward,” a middle school child dreams of how he can change the world by being the catalyst for kindness. He begins his “social experiment” by performing a selfless act of kindness, and so begins the domino effect. As each consecutive person receives an act of kindness they, in turn, do something nice for another. The kindness becomes contagious and changes hundreds of lives for the better. Think of the global impact we could make if more people would make it their mission to simply pay if forward by BEING NICE.