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It's the smell of him in the bathroom, all I need to get ready for the day. Watching him get dressed, and the sound in the kitchen; a slow hum of a song and his movements, picking things to eat. The way I could observe him, for hours, just go on with his day – or as he sleeps – simply breathing in and out, in and out, and it's like the hymn that sings me to peace. I know the world is still out there and I know I'm not yet friendly to its pace, but as long as I know him with me, here, there, somewhere – us – I know I have a chance.

Charlotte Eriksson
love sleep friend peace poetry romance hope song beautiful youth breathing day young morning in-love girl world quote sleeping songwriter prose the-glass-child grateful movement journal us kitchen observe him bathroom getting-dressed lit

There are four categories of questions Emmily asks:1. Can I please go to the bathroom?2. Where is the bathroom?3. Is it okay if I raise my hand and ask a question?4. I don't understand anything you've said in the last thirty minutes. Could you explain it again? Also the last six weeks.

Jim Benton , em Okay, So Maybe I Do Have Superpowers
funny question dumb bathroom

I have notes in my bathroom, yellow notes, and I stick 'em on the mirror, things that happened that were uplifting boosters for me. Notes that say, "Today is special, make today count." And then I have one note on the mirror in the middle that says, "Look at the other notes.

Burt Bacharach
humour mirror notes bathroom sticky-notes

In 1969 America put the man on the moon.In 2016 America put the man in the women's bathroom.

Celso Cukierkorn
politics bathroom transgender

For breakfast to be called ‘in bed’ instead of ‘on top of a bed,’ the house in which it is about to be eaten has to have at least two rooms (excluding the kitchen); (at least) three, if it has a bathroom.

Mokokoma Mokhonoana
marriage romance poverty romantic food courtship eat morning house poor pursue room toilet breakfast kitchen court bed-and-breakfast woo eaten wedding weddings chase meal bathroom houses rooms marriages meals toilets anniversary nutrition bathrooms restroom kitchens ate b-b breakfast-in-bed breakfasted breakfasts hit-on hitting-on restrooms

To me bathtubs are the epitome of luxury. Either you have no money to own one or you have no time to use one.

Akilnathan Logeswaran
time money luxury rich-people privilege bathroom bathtub bathtubs

Seeing his daughter slowly die, coupled with his infinite sadness and misery, the clockmaker becomes a recluse to the tower of the castle and begins to build something behind closed doors, not even his daughter knows what he’s up to. For five years, she only sees him briefly at meal-times before locking himself up in the tower once again...""...Did he have a bathroom in the tower?""Yes, Jack. A big one! En-suite! Power-shower and spa! Where was I!?

Jonathan Dunne , em Hearts Anonymous
death loss grief funny mourning power sarcasm shower weird mourn toilet hilarious clock bathroom recluse bereavment potty castle behind-closed-doors clockmaker potty-time spa

Lady and gentleman, when my parents left Korea with nothing but the clothes on their backs and the considerable wealth they had amassed in the shipping business, they had a dream. They had a dream that one day amid the snowy hilltops of western North Carolina, their son would lose his virginity to a cheerleader in the woman's bathroom of a Waffle House just off the interstate. My parents have sacrificed so much for this dream! And that is why we must journey on, despite all trials and tribulations! Not for me and least of all for the poor cheerleader in question, but for my parents and indeed for all immigrants who came to his great nation in what they themselves could never have: CHEERLEADER SEX.

John Green , em Let It Snow: Three Holiday Romances
sex virginity immigration bathroom cheerleaders

THE DAY I ALMOST KILLED MYSELFIt was afternoon and the razorreflected the sky like like a mirror. The bath towelswere white like the bathtub and my wristswere white like the towels.The bathwater got lukewarm.The afternoon turned into lateafternoon and I was still pulling ropes of airinto my lungs like a sailor. The razor reflectedthe sunset. The bathwater got cold.The bath towels were white like the bathtub and my wrists were white like the towels.

Karen Finneyfrock , em The Sweet Revenge of Celia Door
poetry suicide teen bathroom

I'm past competing in pissing contests. My jet stream is now more of a trickle. The only contest I'd win is the number of trips to the bathroom it takes to purge a 32oz soda.

Brian MacLearn
humor humorous old-age conflict funny-but-true arguments bathroom competing contests

I used to think that size does not count, until I realized that most people either find other people’s faeces more disgusting than a bird’s droppings, or they do not find the latter disgusting at all.

Mokokoma Mokhonoana
food shit bird toilet disgusting animal size sustenance disgust bathroom toilets nutrition faeces feces size-counts size-does-not-count droppings excrement size-does-count size-does-matter size-does-not-matter size-doesnt-count size-doesnt-matter size-matters

She was feeling something: a tiny pinpoint of feeling. She shifted slightly on the bathroom tiles. No. Surely not. From a book?

Lianne Moriarty , em Big Little Lies
books emotions feeling bathroom

...his lazy eye drifting around the room like a child looking for the bathroom.

Chuck Klosterman , em Downtown Owl
child bathroom klosterman lazy-eye

No, I don't work here, I'm taking pictures of messy bathrooms for a photo essay on the American West. But I'm always up for clean, so if you want to pitch in, I've got Pine Sol and a sponge in my car... It's that VW microbus parked next to the dumpster, and you don't need a key, just pull hard.

Pansy Schneider-Horst
photography clean bathroom restroom vw

When I go to the bathrooms, I cannot take off my pants as before; because there is a light continuously blinking like a camera, everyone says it is just an environmental friendly lighting. Well, I cannot really trust it and I am not taking the risk of circulating my naked photos around.

M.F. Moonzajer , em LOVE, HATRED AND MADNESS
joke funny internet bathroom camera pants blinking

I could take a shower every day in my own bathroom. I almost didn’t know what to do with such luxury. Other than, you know, not stink.

Brandon Sanderson , em Firefight
day shower luxury stink bathroom

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