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  3. Raquel Cepeda
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The truth is usually left for us to hunt and gather independently, if we are so inclined.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
truth history truth-seeker miseducation re-learning relearning truth-seeking

This thing I am feeling, I’m almost certain, is the closest I’ll ever come to standing somewhere in between truth and reconciliation.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
life truth life-lessons self-awareness enlightenment journey life-journey reconciliation sojourn spiritual-journey truth-and-reconciliation

Come to think of it, maybe God is a He after all, because only a cruel force would create something this beautiful and make it inaccessible to most people.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
god beauty spiritual spirituality travel traveler traveling morocco sahara sahara-desert

Support and encouragement are found in the most unlikely places.

inspirational inspiration support encouragement

Individually, every grain of sand brushing against my hands represents a story, an experience, and a block for me to build upon for the next generation.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
inspiration build life-experience journey trek trekking ancestors sand spiritual-journey morocco sahara sahara-desert ancestry building-blocks globe-trotting

If Aphrodite chills at home in Cyprus for most of the year, then Fez must be the goddess’s playground.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
inspiration beauty travel aphrodite traveling morocco cyprus aphrodite-s-playground fes fez inspired-travel

I have never bought into the idea that blood is thicker than water. Love and respect are meant to be earned from our children, our spouses, our families, and our friends.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
love friendship relationships respecting-others relationship-advice blood-is-thicker-than-water spousal-love

When we illuminate the road back to our ancestors, they have a way of reaching out, of manifesting themselves...sometimes even physically.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
life inspirational spirituality journey illumination ancestors manifestation ancestry journey-in-life mythos

Even the juncture in history and the zeitgeist we live in is something we choose, setting the scene for the spiritual fodder we need to grow and achieve deeper elevation of our souls.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
soul choices spirituality spirit history reincarnation freedom-of-choice spiritual-growth journey elevation spirituality-religion zeitgeist kabbalah kabbalistic deeper-elevation sojourner spiritual-elevation

While America will always, I think, feel foreign to me, New York City is my home. This is where I can construct my own identity freely and reject labels imposed on me.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
home freedom identity self-awareness america freedom-of-choice racism race labels freedom-of-thought united-states new-york-city homeland foreign racial-constructs

If it weren’t for her setting me free, I may still be a caged bird today, holding my own daughter captive on a shit-laden perch.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
freedom mothers motherhood breaking-free cycles caged-bird breaking-cycles

For some, excavating the past isn’t an adventure, it’s more akin to tearing a Band-Aid off an open wound.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
forgetting forgetting-the-past history the-past excavating-the-past open-wounds

I think Dad wanted to feel the pain, to feel his body cry, an urgent reminder that he was still alive. I pretended not to notice.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
pain father alive mortality father-and-daughter

More than anything, this place feels familiar. I bury my hands in the hot sand and think about the embodiment of memory or, more specifically, our natural ability to carry the past in our bodies and minds. Individually, every grain of sand brushing against my hands represents a story, an experience, and a block for me to build upon for the next generation. I quietly thank this ancestor of mine for surviving the trip so that I could one day return.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
spirituality memory travel trekking ancestors life-journey spiritual-journey sahara sahara-desert ancestral-memory journeying ancestral-continuum ancestral-dna

I wish she’d said something different, but patriarchy is as prevalent around the world as racism and xenophobia are. We can’t hide from it, not even here.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
travel patriarchy traveling morocco amazigh-girl atlas-mountains

Globalization by the way of McDonald’s and KFC has captured the hearts, the minds, and from what I can see through the window, the growing bellies of the folks here.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
travel traveling western-culture western-world west globalization western-philosophy western-influence mcdonald-s kfc

To me, travel is more valuable than any stupid piece of bling money can buy.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
travel journey bling traveling-abroad journeying value-in-traveling

Hip-hop...has been the proverbial key that’s opened the door for me to roam this breathtaking planet.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
hip-hop travel journey traveling hiphop roaming journeys-in-life journeying global-hip-hop proverbial-key

The past is buried deep within the ground in Rabat, although the ancient walls in the old city are still standing, painted in electrifying variations of royal blue that make the winding roads look like streamlets or shallow ocean water.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
travel history the-past traveling morocco ancient-walls buried-past rabat royal-blue

I fall in love with Paraíso. It’s like a giant playground where I’m never scolded for running around recklessly, where I’m almost overwhelmed with the amount of attention and love I receive from Mami’s family. In New York, I’m invisible.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
home loneliness family alone identity isolation coming-of-age paradise invisibility paraiso transnational

Lately, Mami’s eyes have been so dark, I don’t like looking into them because I’m afraid I’ll fall in.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
darkness stress eyes family-relationships mothers-and-daughters mami rocio

I remember feeling that pieces of me were scattered around the world; I belonged to her, Mother Earth.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
identity self-awareness mother-earth internationalism

Hip-hop is storytelling.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
culture hip-hop storytelling storytellers youth-culture counterculture

I guess it all depends on whom you ask and when you ask. Race, I've learned, is in the eye of the beholder.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
identity racism race hispanic-american hispanic latina latina-american latino-american race-as-concept racial-ambiguity

...being Latino means being from everywhere, and that is exactly what America is supposed to be about.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
identity america racism race internationalism racial-constructs hispanic latino-american being-latina being-latino latino-american-identity race-matters

Foisting an identity on people rather than allowing them the freedom and space to create their own is shady.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
freedom identity race freedom-of-thought race-in-america immigrant-experience hispanic latino-americans latinos

The tension between people is palpable, and the ideal of what it means to be and look American becomes a preoccupation to folks around the country, including me.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
identity america racism race status-quo race-relations identity-crisis latino identity-politics american-people american-society latino-americans hispanics latina-americans racial-tension

Alice’s razor-thin blond hair is what people in Santo Domingo call bueno, but I don’t understand how that kind of hair can be good. It doesn’t move at all, or ripple like the water in Boca Chica when I throw shells at it.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
identity hair hair-drama boca-chica good-hair pelo-bueno santo-domingo

Are Latino-Americans white? Black? Other? Illegal aliens from Mars? Or are we the very face of America?

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
identity america race political hispanic-american racism-in-the-west hispanic hyphenated-identities latina-american latino-american racial-ambiguity

The things that come to us easily, our propensities, are carried on a deep subconscious level into our next life. There are no coincidences.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
enlightenment afterlife journey coincidence subconscious life-journey spiritual-journey after-life ancestral-memory spiritual-connection journeying no-coincidence propensities

Paradise is a state of being, more than just the name of a suburb or a home.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
home spirituality being paradise state-of-being suburbia

Listen kid, it’s just you and me now, so let’s help each other out. Always be honest with me, and show me how to be the mother and father I never had. I’ll make a mess of things sometimes, and I’m sorry in advance, but I’ll try. My word is bond.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
mother motherhood mothers-and-daughters single-parenthood young-mothers

She looks like an empty shell of a woman with her soul hovering above her. We believe in spiritual guías in Santo Domingo. Hers is her own self. I can see Mami’s soul desperately trying to find its way back into her small body.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
spirituality lost spiritual-guides lost-innocence mami

This is what I know about my parents. They spent the next several years trying to forget each other, and me.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
life forgetting parents divorce coming-of-age families family-saga

Nobody, she felt, understood her--not her mother, not her father, not her sister or brother, none of the girls or boys at school, nadie--except her man.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
love infatuation teenage-love lust first-love teenagers adolescence

Perhaps finding out that we carry New World history in our genes will transcend racial checkboxes altogether and enable Latino-Americans to rethink what America is supposed to look like.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
race race-relations new-world race-in-america hispanic hispanic-identity latino-american latino-american-identity race-matters new-world-history

Shakespeare had it right all along: Love will kill you in the end.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
wisdom romeo-and-juliet shakespeare relationship-advice shakespeare-in-love love-lost love-kills

Women destroy me. I allow them to.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
infidelity weakness cheating masculinity machismo male-and-female-relationships

We aren’t encouraged to think for ourselves and ask questions. We are expected to accept what they teach us as infallible truths.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
coming-of-age educational-system miseducation infallibility educational-inequity

You are meant to be, despite how you got here; you’ll see someday.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
spirituality coming-of-age divine-intervention spiritual-guides journey-in-life

Hip-hop, this thing we love that loves us back, is our lingua franca.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
hip-hop coming-of-age youth-culture counterculture disenfranchisement 80s-hip-hop lingua-franca

Sometimes opposites attract, or so they say, but Paloma and Rocío were like arroz and mangú: they didn’t really mix well.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
sisters family opposites sisterhood family-relationships dysfunctional-families family-drama family-saga hispanic latino-american latina-americans sisters-sibling-rivalry latinas

The hospital room was as cold as dead skin, the hallway crowded with lost souls and reeking of illness.

em Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina
sickness souls mortality hospital father-and-daughter

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