A woman has but two loves in life: the one who broke her heart and the one she spends the rest of her life with."- Carolyn Chase, former Broadcast Journalist and heroine Kate Theodore's mother

When my worldwas nothing but darknessI set my soul on fire.

I lived for so long without you, only dreaming of the concept of you. And, now that I know you, I can't imagine going back there... to a me that didn't know your name.

She chose messy, she chose wild. She chose life on her own terms.

I am worth more than these excuses. I am worth more than this inconsistent, unhealthy, disappointing dynamic. I am worthy of finding someone that is never going to allow us to settle into this toxic, distorted version of love.

We can feel damaged and sad and mad and know that it doesn’t make us any less worthy than when we didn’t feel that way.

It’s like there’s a check-list of accomplishments that people expect from you. Like it’s the only path to happiness, this societal construct of what makes us successful and worthy. But, don’t buy it. You can be happy no matter which part of the story you’re in. You are worthy in every chapter.

Sometimes, the emptiness comes to fill the space between my heart and my head. It consumes every thought, every corner of my mind, like demons that can’t be put to bed.

Fear is a fickle friend who will loyally stand by your side as long as you allow it to diminish you.

I run my fingers down the spines of old books and ancient tales. I smell the ink and feel the pages as I delicately peer at the words and paragraphs. Each book home to a story, giving its characters immortality. I smile and think that perhaps someday, I will make a home out of these pages too. And sit on a shelf, ready and waiting to share my story with the next reader.

Not many get to see this side of him. So, if you do, know that you’re lucky.

When we let go of our pride, we give ourselves permission to be human. We give ourselves permission to slip up and hurt and to grow without ridiculous standards of perfection constantly looming over our heads. We give ourselves a chance to face conflicts, to face ourselves, and to heal. And, in this healing process, we give others a chance to follow our lead.

There is a reasonthat the worldis not black and white,for chaosdemands color.

I promise permanence. I promise persistence. I promise that falling in love was just the beginning for us.

So many questionsbut nothing to say,in this current momentwe are still so farfrom the answers.

Falling in love with you was out of my control, but I do have a say in what happens next. And, I will choose to stay in love with you through everything this life throws at us.

Our biggest moments have happened in silence. In glances and embraces. As though our souls had found rest within each other. As though our hearts were memorizing the feelings and inscribing them in a language no one else could understand.

And you find that sometimes you search to fill a void that doesn’t exist until you venture out far enough to create it.

You don’t have to stop fighting for others, you just have to remember to fight for yourself too.

You’re looking for real love in a ‘right now’ culture. And, many people might mistake you for just a ‘right now’ person. But, don’t let that fool you. You deserve the real love, the forever love. It might not be ‘right now’, but it’ll be the right love. And, it’ll be worth the wait.

She was always the first to love, first to encourage, first to forgive...for everyone but herself.

By nature, we want to be liked. We want to be accepted. But, most of the time, we allow our worth to be decided by the people on the sidelines. By people that see snapshots of our life but have no clue what the whole picture looks like.