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  3. Julie Lythcott-Haims
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What is shaping the way we dream? Yes we dream of our selves, of what we will become, but it's the environment that tells us what is possible. I don't think our dreams are limitless; they are bounded by the society we live in and its conception of what is respectable and good.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
dreams parenting

But we should open our eyes to the many ways in which hypervigilance keeps them penned in from the more liberated life they deserve to live and that in turn would prepare them for adulthood.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
freedom independence parenting

When you intervene on behalf of your child, your child becomes the victim. You're expressing the message 'You're incapable, you're not sturdy enough to resolve this yourself, you need me to come in and take care of this for you.'" You are, in essence, disempowering your child.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
freedom independence parenting

Resilience is built from real hardship and cannot be bought or manufactured.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
failure parenting resilience

We’re depriving our kids of the chance to do the work of life for themselves.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
independence parenting

Young adults come to resent the people who did the thinking for them.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
independence parenting

A sense of purpose is essential for achieving happiness and satisfaction in life.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
parenting

There is something that's a great deal more important than parental approval: learning to do without it. That's what it means to become an adult.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
independence parenting

The best predictor of success is a sense of resiliency, grit, capacity to fail and get up. If you're prevented from feeling discomfort of failure, you have no sense of how to handle those things at all.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
parenting failiure

Sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do but you suck it up and do it anyway, and that's what teaches you humility, work ethic, responsibility, and follow-through.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
responsibility humility work-ethic grit

Happiness and self-confidence can be the by-products of other things, but they cannot really be goals unto themselves.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
happiness self-confidence

We're [as parents] striving for an unattainable, inauthentic shell, and ignoring the real nut, the gooey inside: love, laughter, and fulfillment from simple things.

em How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
love laughter authenticity simple-life

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