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A young man was sitting at home when a terrible rainstorm began. Within hours, the man’s house began to flood, and someone came to his door offering a ride to higher ground. The man declined, saying, 'God will take care of me.' A few hours later, as the waters engulfed the first floor of the man’s home, a boat passed by, and the captain offered to take the man to safety. The man declined, saying, 'God will take care of me.' A few hours after that, as the man waited on his roof—his entire home flooded—a helicopter flew by, and the pilot offered transportation to dry land. Again the man declined, telling the pilot that God would care for him. Soon thereafter, the waters overcame the man, and as he stood before God in heaven, he protested his fate: 'You promised that you’d help me so long as I was faithful.' God replied, 'I sent you a car, a boat, and a helicopter. Your death is your own fault.' God helps those who help themselves.

em Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis
heaven faith god help parable flood

...Mom equated money with affection...but I never cared about the money. I just wanted her to be healthy.

em Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis
affection money

But yeah, like everyone else in our family, they could go from zero to murderous in a fucking heartbeat.

em Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis
family parents abuse

To this day, being able to “take advantage” of someone is the measure in my mind of having a parent. For me and Lindsay, the fear of imposing stalked our minds, infecting even the food we ate. We recognized instinctively that many of the people we depended on weren’t supposed to play that role in our lives, so much so that it was one of the first things Lindsay thought of when she learned of Papaw’s death. We were conditioned to feel that we couldn’t really depend on people—that, even as children, asking someone for a meal or for help with a broken-down automobile was a luxury that we shouldn’t indulge in too much lest we fully tap the reservoir of goodwill serving as a safety valve in our lives.

em Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis
parents childhood

...intricate stone carvings and wood trim gave the law school an almost medieval feel. You'd even sometimes hear that we went to HLS (Hogwarts Law School).

em Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis
law hogwarts buildings

For kids like me, the part of the brain that deals with stress and conflict is always activated...We are constantly ready to fight or flee, because there is a constant exposure to the bear, whether that bear is an alcoholic dad or an unhinged mom (p228)....I see conflict and I run away or prepare for battle. (p246)

em Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis
stress fight conflict flee adverse-circumstances

There is nothing lower than the poor stealing from the poor. It's hard enough as it is. We sure as hell don't need to make it even harder on each other.

em Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis
poor stealing-from-poor

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