Mom often said to me, "I know if you look good, you get special treatment." And then she went a step further: "I don't care what the world says or does. You have to remember that every person is valuable.

You know how powerful it can be when you discover that you can do something you never thought you could? It changes everything… and gets you thinking about what else you can do that you weren’t aware of.

The Internet is a funny place, because it’s a forum for so many awful ideas, body shaming, bullying, and the like. The negative side of social media is that everybody thinks they’re experts with the right to weigh in on.Yet, at the same time, the Internet is a place where women can find solidarity, no matter who or where they are.

You are good enough to make whatever you want to achieve possible. You just need to find your talent and passion, then put a heck a lot of work into it.

No matter how beautiful or not one is perceived to be, the true beauty we all possess is found on the inside. That should be our focus and the measure by which we are judged. How do we move through life? What other lives have we touched? Who have we confronted with love? How have we changed the world for the better? Those are all qualities that can’t be countered or weighed. Really, beauty beyond size.

I also need to honor myself for working so hard, and that means treating the money I earn with respect.

Don’t fall into the trap of sacrificing your self-esteem for affection and acceptance. No matter what your size, you are a sexy goddess. Remember that.

The irony is that food gives me a sense of control, even though it makes me totally out of control. Food is something I can choose, order, have delivered. I sit down, eat, and feel really good in the moment. At its essence, food is nourishing. There is truth in that. The trick is understanding and respecting the line where it crosses over into something unhealthy.

The bond between food and me is like other relationships in my life: complicated, evolving, demanding, and in need of constant work. But together we’ve come so far, moving from my childhood obligation to clean my plate, to a mindless need to fill up, to a truly nourishing and pleasurable exchange. That’s the real reward.

Women have to support each other more. Women get women. We understand each other when we are happy or sad, when we have our period, start a new job, or fall in love. We are typically the caretakers. Let’s take care of each other, start building each other up. The stereotype with women is that we are catty and vindictive. It’s important to fight against that notion. I have a no BS policy in my circle.

I am more than my measurements. The cycle of body-shaming needs to end. I’m over it… My body is MY body. I’ll call the shots.